Inquiring With Curiosity

During a recent meeting, a newly hired leader mistakenly stated that a particular process was not in place and commented on perceived disorganization of the team. They had not yet sought to understand the established procedures or existing workflows, despite being new to the organization. While I cannot speak for others, I found these remarks unsettling and saw the missed opportunity to build trust and support collaboration.

Phil M. Jones’s book, Exactly What to Say, underscores the value of framing statements with success-oriented language to positively influence others. Leaders who approach conversations with curiosity—using phrases such as “I’m curious to learn…” or “Can you walk me through how this works?”—signal openness and respect, which encourages engagement and idea sharing.

Rather than forming immediate judgments, leaders can pose constructive questions to promote meaningful dialogue and learning. Here are some examples:

• How is feedback incorporated into future planning?

• What is the process for debriefing after projects?

• What opportunities exist for improving collaboration within the team?

Partnering with a coach can help guide leaders to develop greater self-awareness and emotional intelligence, shifting from a mindset of judgment to one of inquiry and learning. This approach not only helps them avoid missed opportunities to build trust but also creates an environment where the team feels valued and empowered to contribute, ultimately driving collective success.